Life's Matters

Today, Friday, August 13, 2010, I welcome my meantime. I give in to the fact that I have to do some soul cleaning before love comes. One must say "hello" to change and welcome all painful truths and unwanted facts about themselves. One must realize while others go through the "meantime", it can be hurtful becaused closed scalps will have to be reopened on old wounds and that's going to hurt like heck. During this process, I and others moved to change will realize some wrong thoughts drawn about that caused what has been felt, seen, believed, or even concluded from past relationships. I've realized love is none of the things I associated with it posing an awful feeling. I don't know if I've ever actually seen the kind of love I desire. The image I had of love has smeared colors that are bleeding on one another. In the words of Iyanla Vanzant I wanted someone to make me fly, and not even care if the people on the ground can see my panties while I'm...

I have been thinking lately about life after death. I want to live Godly in an effort to live eternally in Glory. People often ask “what if there isn't a heaven?”and to those people I would say "it's not harming me any to try a consciously live Godly. What harm am I doing to myself or others striving to show love most of the time, even to complete strangers. Can I send myself or others to a state of depression or disappointment by wanting them to see God in me, which means they will mostly encounter God when meeting me. It will be too late for da** at that time of departure, so I'm going to live everyday as if in the morning I may wake in the presence of the Almighty. I can only suggest u do the same and remember I'm only human and trying to play my part in God's plan for us all. He plans on my presence in eternity and I sure don't want to disappoint Him. So again live, laugh, love, and let God walk with you into eternal destiny.

I have tried all my life to figure out who or what I am to do. Nothing seems to work in my favor for long. It has taken me about 30 years to figure out why. I decided to make some changes during this summer break from work. I would not have thought the transformation would have taken place a couple of days before work was to begin again. I know now it had to. I realize now things keep getting out of whack because I should just be living and allowing God to guide me. See we weren't born to live for ourselves.We were born to do a job for God while living. The rewards would be full of joy everlasting. Ok some pain, how else do we know what the joy feels like. I recently gave myself permission to grow and that meant going back to childhood spiritually and giving God (the permission he didn't need but I'm sure he appreciated me giving)permission to really order my steps. He breathed the breath of life in me, so the least I could do as I rise is say "Yes, Lord, speak to me...